hot coffee girl

A horse walk into the bar and the barman says "Why the long face?"
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A bear walks into a bar and says "I would like......... a pint please". The barman says "Why the large pause?"
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*drum roll*

It's all in the ways you tell 'em

A guy walks into a bar and says, "Ouch."

Thank dog I'm not dyslexic...

A doctor, a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartenders says, "What is this, a joke?"

A guy wearing a metal helmet with a light on it and carrying a pickaxe walks into a bar. The bartender yells "No miners allowed!"

A man walks into a bar. A bar that could have been pouring the same beer into the same mugs since Grover Cleveland was president. A bar that brings instant comfort and relief from the rat race of the city outside the front door. A bar with stools as well worn as the patrons sitting on them. Drinks are on the house….courtesy of the Twilight Zone.

Ok, so it's not a joke...I just felt like going all Rod Serling on your asses.

I blonde walks into a bar and asks the bartender "where are all the men?" and he answers "at your house waiting for you to finish your last drink".

A blonde walks into a bar, sits at the bar, orders a screwdriver, takes a few sips and passes out. The bartender immediately takes her in the back, takes advantage of her, and then puts her back on the stool at the bar where she eventually wakes-up and goes home.
The next day she comes in, orders another screwdriver, and the same thing happens all over again.
This goes on for three more days until she comes in on the fourth day and orders a vodka-tonic. The bartender asks why she changed her drink order and she replied "because screwdrivers make my p***y hurt".

Shakespeare walks into a bar. The barman shouts, 'Oi, you! Get out, you're bard!'.

Thanks, I'm here all week. Try the chicken.

Phew, just an inch off Muffy's one...

A spiral galaxy walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Oi! You're barred!"

You guys rock.