hot coffee girl

Remember about a week back I said that I was running on fumes?

Apparently, you can go that way for a while. I am so tired. My brain is on total overload, and I still can't see an end in sight. I have moments where I think that it's going to get easier, and then I get whacked in the head. I leave work, go home, eat, and do more work. I am a terrible friend, girlfriend, and person in general. If I have to apologize to one more fucking person for not giving 100%, I might just go batty.

I don't mind putting forth the effort if I feel as if I "got it all done" at the end of the day. But at the end of my days, I only feel like I left more undone than done.

I don't know what to do or where to turn, but as I told Jenn, I am about a heartbeat away from packing up The Boy, the Little Dog, and the Bitchy Cat and heading out to Key West to lay on the beach and stay there.

I think I could get a job on a boat or something. I like fish. 

A termite walks into a bar and asks, "Is the bar tender here?"

...

A sandwich walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'm sorry. We don't serve food here." 

...

A guy walks into a bar with a piece of asphalt. He says to the bartender, "I'll take a beer and one for the road." 

...

A giraffe walks into a bar. "High balls are on me!"

...

Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks. 

...

A dyslexic walks into a bra. 

...

Your turn. Go. 

Psst!

Over here, bitches. 

Once upon a time, in a land so far away,
Princess of The Coffee Hot did not take time to play.

She worked all day and all night too.
She traveled both far and near to visit god knows who.

Her friends got pissed and left her alone,
“You don’t call. You don’t write. You never even phone!”

The Boy was neglected, too-but he never ever cried.
He should’ve smacked her on the head (though not once he even tried).

She morphed into a grayish lump - no sunlight on her skin.
Instead of going out for fun, she always stayed right in.

“Stop this now,” the Princess said, “Or else I might just burst!”
“I need to relax and catch my breath before it is the worst!”

With fire in her eyes and resolve in her heart,
She closed up the files and began with a start.

She promised that the weekend-whatever it may bring,
Would not include anything that resembled work-like things.

When the whistle blows at five on the dot,
The Princess of Coffee will be out like a shot.

She will play and dance and laugh and cough,
But rest assured-the fucking cell will be off.

Blogging from the plane...

It’s that time again.

Yep, you guessed it. It’s time to play everyone’s favorite game…let’s see just how quickly we can turn around a trip across the country. I am going to tie my previous record…flying out to LA at 8:50 EST on Monday night and returning a mere 34 hours later at 6:30 on Wednesday morning.

The difference here is that while I didn’t get loads of sleep the last time around, I am slated to get to the hotel at what will feel like 2 a.m. to me…and make changes to a site that I am presenting tomorrow. Fly 2,000 to spend the night curled up with JavaScript and good old fashioned HTML…a threesome any girl would love.

The good news is I am flying first class both ways…so at least I am not suffering from coach ass. The bad news is that despite some excellent medicinal aids washed down with a few glasses of a cabernet that was younger than a Michael Jackson houseguest…I am still not able to sleep on the plane. I can’t turn off my brain tonight. I keep thinking of all that has happened at work in the past week, and all the work that is yet to be done.

The light at the end of the tunnel…that’s not a train, is it?